Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Jerry, you need to find god
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
