i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize