Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Randomize
