y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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