So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
