y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize