She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
