North Korea, Best Korea!
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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