hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize