first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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