spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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