If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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