420 ftw
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize