YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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