That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Randomize
