just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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