I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
