Don't make out with my wife yet
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize