You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
