a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
just tell him i said nine months
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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