S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
