would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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