Christians are straight up FREAKS
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
it hurts more in the daytime
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
