When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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