so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
