I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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