I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
third nipple confirmed
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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