sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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