No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
