Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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