i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
