she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
