i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
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