i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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