we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
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