While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Randomize
