This girl is more easily done than said...
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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