I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
