I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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