I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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