There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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