PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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