what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
