Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize