Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Randomize
