She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
