My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
