can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
