TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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