He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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