The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
