i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
